Goes together like a horse and carriage

My relatives can smell an impending marriage like sharks can blood in the water. I went down to the P.O. to pick up my mail and there was a letter from an aunt I hadn't talked to in years, pretending as if I hadn't told her to take a long walk off a short pier more than a decade ago - easy for her to do since she lives in Wrightsville Beach, NC. You can't pick your relatives, but you can pick your fights. Giving her the boot was one of the smartest things I did vs.-a-vs. my relatives, sparing me years of passive-aggressive boasting about her yuppie scum progeny.

I also got tired of her uncritical support of Child Molesters Anonymous AKA the unHoly Roman Catholic Church. All that whining about immoral Hollywood when I was growing up, and they couldn't see the real perverts for the trees... Her corporate drone of a husband worked for IBM for decades. I pride myself on being reasonably intelligent but I was never able to figure out exactly what he did there, other than being a cog in the machine. IBM and Catholicism and Nazis, wotta mash-up!